It’s Not in Your Head, It’s in Your Nervous System

Many of my clients arrive in therapy having done a lot. They’ve read the books, listened to the podcasts, and tried to shift their mindset. Yet they still feel anxious, reactive, shut down, or unable to relax.

What they’re often missing isn’t more information. It’s safety. Not the kind we think about, but the kind we feel. Deep in the body. The kind that doesn’t come from logic, but from connection.

Trauma Lives in the Nervous System, Not the Mind

Trauma doesn’t just affect the memory. It leaves an imprint on the nervous system. Every overwhelming experience that was too much, too soon, or too prolonged, can shape how your system learns to respond.

It might be a childhood filled, or peppered, with unpredictability, rejection, or emotional neglect.

... Or years of being in a high-pressure role where failure wasn’t an option.

Over time, your system learns to protect you.

It stays alert. It keeps you guarded.

The problem is that whilst you may not be in actual danger anymore, your nervous system hasn’t caught up.

It’s still bracing, still scanning ... because a part of your brain's network is still active...

Why Thinking Alone Doesn’t Heal Trauma

The brain is a brilliant problem-solver. But healing isn’t a puzzle. It’s a shift... A change in state that happens deep within, not because of a simple change in how you decide to think about it.

You can understand your past completely and still feel stuck.

That’s because trauma isn’t stored in the part of the brain that thinks. It’s held in the parts responsible for emotion, memory, and survival.

This Is Science, Not Just Support

Trauma-focused treatments like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) and Internal Family Systems (IFS) are not just supportive, they are evidence-based. These are structured, protocol-led approaches grounded in neuroscience.

Not just car accidents and earthquakes...

Research shows that the events shaping our emotional and physiological responses don’t always have to be major.

Sometimes, a single social interaction can leave a lasting imprint.

While trauma can include significant experiences like accidents or natural disasters, it's the way these events are processed and stored in the brain and nervous system that truly determines their impact.

The therapy I recommend now as a first line is to work with memory networks, neuroplasticity, and the nervous system’s predictive responses. When shift happens, something powerful returns. Calm, playfulness, confidence, emotional clarity, balance...

What Real Change Looks Like

Healing doesn’t always look dramatic. It can be subtle, steady, and profound.

It looks like:

• Feeling less on edge during everyday moments

  
  

• Sleeping more easily, without spirals of thought

  
  

• Responding instead of reacting

  
  

• Feeling calmer, more grounded, more like yourself

  
  

• Trusting your body again

These changes don’t come from more insight. They come from nervous system shifts. From being met, not just understood.

What to Consider Next

Let me ask you:

• Do you feel like part of you is still stuck in the past, reacting as if it’s happening all over again?

  
  

• Does a part of you struggle to slow down... so you keep moving, planning, fixing, because slowing down feels risky?

  
  

• Do your emotional reactions feel bigger than what’s actually going on?

If so, this is your nervous system calling for support. It’s a sign that some parts of you are still doing the work of survival, long after the danger has passed.

So if you’re spending even a couple of hours a week on LinkedIn, Facebook, the news, online shopping ...

… or digesting self-help content that stays in your head but doesn't connect with your body, then you can absolutely make space for this.

If you would like to speak to me in person and hear my recommendations for your situation and what you would like to achieve, just book a free call-back.